Between You & Me

I’ve started and stopped this post so many times because I’m not quite sure how to put into words all the reasons I’m taking a break from my blog during Lent.

First and foremost, I’m feeling it as deep down as you can feel something…I know it’s what I need to do.
I could just end it there, but that wouldn’t be the least bit fun, so here goes…

People start blogs for all sorts of reasons. Mine is a super simple {somewhat ridiculous} reason.

When our family moved to Florida back in 2008, I left behind a sweet community and my precious family.
I felt lost.
My boys went to public school about a month after we moved, and I was at home all day with our brand new daughter who came to us from China just 6 months before the big move.
I was lonely and all out of sorts.

Lost and Lonely. Those seem like perfect reasons to start a blog, right?!
The good news is that God uses all things, even ridiculous things. Thankfully, in God’s economy, nothing is wasted.

Somewhere along the way, my love for design and my love for words collided, and our sign business was born.
The life lessons that developing and running an on-line business are teaching us are endless.
Blogging has also introduced me to some people I’d like to think would be genuine friends, if we lived closer.
So many of you have emailed me after a post and shared some of your story with me and asked me to join you in prayer for things going on in your life. What an honor. At the risk of sounding dramatic, it is sacred ground.

After just a few years in Florida, our family moved home to North Georgia.
We’re able to do life with my family again, we’re serving in a church with dear friends, we’re at a school with parents and teachers who are partnering beautifully with us for our kids’ education and spiritual formation, and we’re in a small group with people who are opening their stories up to us and letting us do the same.
Life is full. People are in the arena with us.

It’s been about a year or so that I’ve struggled with blogging. It’s been a struggle to become willing to just lay it down. Apparently, I hold tight to the things that bring me the least amount of comfort. I guess we all do.

It’s time to reevaluate what place blogging needs to have in my life.

I’m not lonely and lost and all out of sorts anymore.
All of those people that make life full are right here in front of me. I want to be fully engaged and present.

Also, God has been stirring something in me all year. I knew when the kids went back to school in the fall that He would use this year to make some things clear to me.

Here’s why it’s been hard to just lay it down and take the needed time to process and pray:: I’m afraid.
Fear often finds a way to step in front of faith.

One fear is that taking a break from blogging might somehow hurt our sign business.
We’re not closing our shop, and I’ll still be reaching out on Instagram and offering discounts through other bloggers, so there’s absolutely no relevance to my fear.
I want to surrender to the truth…the business is from God. He is our provider, and whatever he brings to us is exactly what we need.

Another fear is trusting him to lead me in the desire that he’s been stirring this year…to trust that everything will fall into place. I want so badly to operate in my old ways…taking the bull by it’s horn and making a way for myself. We so often make his will about our plans, and it’s just not where his peace resides.
I want to surrender to the truth…he knows the plans he has for me, and they are good. His timing is perfect. His will is that I know him and make him known. His peace is found in knowing him.

Lent is the perfect opportunity to be disciplined and sharpened by Jesus and to refocus my mind’s attention and my heart’s affection to him. I’m breathing lighter just taking the step of obedience away from myself and my fears and towards him.